Yes similar hurt, years ago. But it just leaves me thankful to God that he led me to a church which I can call my true family. They have been through my thick and thin. Prayed and cheered. God knows our heart, our hurts, our longing and he leads us to the right place where we are spiritually loved and refreshed xx Thanks Sarah
Sarah, I'm so sad that you went through that and you're correct, Jesus is not the one that hurt you, He's the One who has always been there for you and He is the One who is healing you. My last two posts have been about this very subject, and while I've not yet found a church home, God has been with me through it all. God bless you!
I was hurt by a couple of churches, so it took years to find one that truly showed me Jesus’s love. Now I’m closer than ever to Jesus. They teach all the fruits of the spirit and that we are each on our own walk. There are people there that may be judgmental- but I’ve learned Who I am in Christ- do it bounces off of me. But never my pastor- he is the true believer who knows we are not perfect yet and preached right from the Bible.
I was raised Catholic, yet I feel more welcome in my local Methodist church. I was snubbed last year by a Catholic priest; he bluntly told me to go to another parish for Confession. No reason, although I suspect its because I'm not in the same socioeconomic group as other church members.
Sarah, you and Mary are such a blessing openig up and being vulnerable and open about a subject that touches many of us who suffer in silence. I've been hurt several times over the past 20 years at various churches as member and staff. Each time it has been heartbreaking and difficult to rebound from. The first time and the last time were the worst. I was in an abusive marriage and the church and members essentially left me out to suffer because they didn't know what or how to respond. I was essentially told to suck it up and live with it. I had for several years when it was focused on me but when the children were targeted I had to take a stand and leave. As a result I lost my support system/family and my sense of security. I had to realign my faith and relationship with God as separate from the church. That took some work. The last hurt was during COVID when I was employed at my church and while recovering from back surgery we parted ways over something I still don't understand. I was in such a vulnerable and isolated state and didn't want to get lost and be alone that I stayed with them as a member until this past October when I moved away to my mom's. I stuffed down the hurt and anger to retain the relationships I had there. I was scared to look elsewhere or to speak to them about how I felt. I still haven't found a new church home but I have a deeper relationship with God that isn't dependent on the church. I miss fellowship and serving but when my mom feels like it I take her to church down here but it's so rural we have to visit multiple churches in a month because they don't meet every week. I watch online a lot and I know during this season I'm in God is mindful of my circumstances and things will work out for me to find a new church home when it's time. In the meantime I'm working on healing and letting go of my anger and hurt. God is so good and He is not the church. He is my rock and my salvation. The church is made up of flawed sinful humans of which I am one. I am choosing to forgive as I have been forgiven. I don't want my hurt and anger to hinder my growth and relationship with other believers in the future or my relationship with God. Thank you both for allowing us space to speak about this. God bless you both. 🙏
You said it perfectly! The church is made up of flawed individuals and I was one of them. I do believe many churches need to truly focus on comforting and outreach for their own members a little more. But I’m thankful that I got the time to truly build my relationship with Jesus in a way I didn’t have before. And like you… I’m ready to step back in.
Sarah, I’m so sorry to read about the rejection and hurt you have been through and at the same time, it’s wonderful to know that as a result you discovered a deeper and more meaningful relationship with Jesus .
I have dear friends/sisters in Jesus who are going through similar hurt .
There has been a ripple effect with family members and others leaving the church fellowship. It’s heartbreaking and I believe that only God has the answers.
I’ve concluded that sometimes we literally need to “let go and let God.”
Thank you for your transparency in sharing at such a personal level.
May God bless you and all of us as we seek to obey the command of Jesus to “ love one another as I have loved you”
It really is about letting go and letting God. I’m learning to let go of a lot and get back to the simplicity of living in His word and seeking only Him as we continue this new journey together x
I was also told I was unredeemable and on my way to hell. There was no salvation for me because I was too rebellious.
When my husband of 6 months beat me black and blue with a leather belt with a buckle I was told I did something to deserve and to go home and submit to my husband.
For 20 years I ran from God believing those lies but He found me. I found a good Church and I was hurt by people there and we didn’t go anywhere for 3 years . Covid happened during that time.
Then we went to a new Church which was wonderful in every way.
And unlearned a lot like you but in the middle of my joy someone hurt me very deeply whose walk with God wasn’t as deep as he made out it was.
Everyone else affirmed me it was him who had the problem but it still broke my heart.
It broke me more because I gave them my heart.
The sting of it has gone now but it was an awful time when I doubted everything in my life and myself.
Was I wrong and were they right?
I was tormented by doubts about my salvation but my experience of the Holy Spirit was more real than anything I had ever called true.
We are still at the Church and we are loved by so many other true Christian’s there and I don’t want to run anymore . This time I am not blaming myself for everything.
I want to say Thank You for sharing your heart with us.
This blesses me so much to hear that you have found a space that loves you and holds you up. That’s what we want! And thank you for sharing pieces of your own journey here ❤️❤️❤️
Sarah, first of all ... thank you for sharing your story and being vulnerable in this space 🙏 💖
I have a very similar story and it has always left me baffled. However, my experience also drew me deeper into the arms if Jesus my sweet redeemer and one true love 🥰
This happened 16 years ago and I still struggle with connection. I've forgiven, but still need to revisit forgiveness on occasion. Everytime I pass the church I pray for the leadership and people, but it still hurts sometimes.
A big part of my story was about an abusive husband who was lying to the church and refused to get the help our family so desperately needed. It was a slow and tormenting death for myself and my 4 children 💔 My children are grown now and have each found healing in their own time and way. However, because this happened in the church and with a so called "Christian" father, it has affected their faith.
Despite their father, I've worked really hard and by the Grace of God helped us to heal and stay connected 🙏 ♥️ ❤️ ❤️❤️
Aww lovely 🥰 thank you for sharing yours! Oh, I absolutely agree on the seeing people and reminding myself that I truly have forgiven, but it does bring up some memories that I didn’t share in this post. Oh but the love and life I have found with Jesus just can’t be compared!
Well, clearly u were in legalistic church. And I am glad that u r out from the false doctrines as well.
It's sad to see that there are many church who don't operate in spirit.
A church who is teaching u to depend on self or pastor or is more busy celebrating each and every day then I guess it's not the church u wanna be in.
A church that helps u grow spiritually, feeds ur spiritual hunger, helps u getting more dependent on God rather than a pastor or self then that's the church u shud be in.
Thankfully God has led me to such a church. It's an online church and people from different cities connect each other. And the bond we have with each other is more real than those who have church in person.
In case if u r still struggling with church, then u may connect with Andrew Wommack ministry. He has wonderful teachings available which will help u grow in Lord more. I was associated with this ministry before I found my church. So that time, Andrew wommack ministry was my church.
This is us right now. We left our old church & are yet to find another church. It's hard & painful. But we trusting Jesus to lead us to where we belong
Yes similar hurt, years ago. But it just leaves me thankful to God that he led me to a church which I can call my true family. They have been through my thick and thin. Prayed and cheered. God knows our heart, our hurts, our longing and he leads us to the right place where we are spiritually loved and refreshed xx Thanks Sarah
I love hearing you have found a beautiful church family ❤️ blesses my heart!
Sarah, I'm so sad that you went through that and you're correct, Jesus is not the one that hurt you, He's the One who has always been there for you and He is the One who is healing you. My last two posts have been about this very subject, and while I've not yet found a church home, God has been with me through it all. God bless you!
Yes 🙌 same here…
Mary, I immediately thought about your last two posts about this when Sarah posted this. So glad you read it.
I was hurt by a couple of churches, so it took years to find one that truly showed me Jesus’s love. Now I’m closer than ever to Jesus. They teach all the fruits of the spirit and that we are each on our own walk. There are people there that may be judgmental- but I’ve learned Who I am in Christ- do it bounces off of me. But never my pastor- he is the true believer who knows we are not perfect yet and preached right from the Bible.
That’s so beautiful to hear ❤️❤️❤️ and will give so much hope to so many! Thanks for sharing you for sharing x
I was raised Catholic, yet I feel more welcome in my local Methodist church. I was snubbed last year by a Catholic priest; he bluntly told me to go to another parish for Confession. No reason, although I suspect its because I'm not in the same socioeconomic group as other church members.
Oh lovely 🥰 I’m so glad you’ve found a place that feels more like a home and accepting.
Thank you so much for sharing what God has put in you heart to bless others! I needed this to let go of the hurt! God bless you!
I’m so glad this post blessed you ❤️❤️❤️
Sarah, you and Mary are such a blessing openig up and being vulnerable and open about a subject that touches many of us who suffer in silence. I've been hurt several times over the past 20 years at various churches as member and staff. Each time it has been heartbreaking and difficult to rebound from. The first time and the last time were the worst. I was in an abusive marriage and the church and members essentially left me out to suffer because they didn't know what or how to respond. I was essentially told to suck it up and live with it. I had for several years when it was focused on me but when the children were targeted I had to take a stand and leave. As a result I lost my support system/family and my sense of security. I had to realign my faith and relationship with God as separate from the church. That took some work. The last hurt was during COVID when I was employed at my church and while recovering from back surgery we parted ways over something I still don't understand. I was in such a vulnerable and isolated state and didn't want to get lost and be alone that I stayed with them as a member until this past October when I moved away to my mom's. I stuffed down the hurt and anger to retain the relationships I had there. I was scared to look elsewhere or to speak to them about how I felt. I still haven't found a new church home but I have a deeper relationship with God that isn't dependent on the church. I miss fellowship and serving but when my mom feels like it I take her to church down here but it's so rural we have to visit multiple churches in a month because they don't meet every week. I watch online a lot and I know during this season I'm in God is mindful of my circumstances and things will work out for me to find a new church home when it's time. In the meantime I'm working on healing and letting go of my anger and hurt. God is so good and He is not the church. He is my rock and my salvation. The church is made up of flawed sinful humans of which I am one. I am choosing to forgive as I have been forgiven. I don't want my hurt and anger to hinder my growth and relationship with other believers in the future or my relationship with God. Thank you both for allowing us space to speak about this. God bless you both. 🙏
You said it perfectly! The church is made up of flawed individuals and I was one of them. I do believe many churches need to truly focus on comforting and outreach for their own members a little more. But I’m thankful that I got the time to truly build my relationship with Jesus in a way I didn’t have before. And like you… I’m ready to step back in.
Sarah, I’m so sorry to read about the rejection and hurt you have been through and at the same time, it’s wonderful to know that as a result you discovered a deeper and more meaningful relationship with Jesus .
I have dear friends/sisters in Jesus who are going through similar hurt .
There has been a ripple effect with family members and others leaving the church fellowship. It’s heartbreaking and I believe that only God has the answers.
I’ve concluded that sometimes we literally need to “let go and let God.”
Thank you for your transparency in sharing at such a personal level.
May God bless you and all of us as we seek to obey the command of Jesus to “ love one another as I have loved you”
It really is about letting go and letting God. I’m learning to let go of a lot and get back to the simplicity of living in His word and seeking only Him as we continue this new journey together x
Sarah
You have just described my life.
I was also told I was unredeemable and on my way to hell. There was no salvation for me because I was too rebellious.
When my husband of 6 months beat me black and blue with a leather belt with a buckle I was told I did something to deserve and to go home and submit to my husband.
For 20 years I ran from God believing those lies but He found me. I found a good Church and I was hurt by people there and we didn’t go anywhere for 3 years . Covid happened during that time.
Then we went to a new Church which was wonderful in every way.
And unlearned a lot like you but in the middle of my joy someone hurt me very deeply whose walk with God wasn’t as deep as he made out it was.
Everyone else affirmed me it was him who had the problem but it still broke my heart.
It broke me more because I gave them my heart.
The sting of it has gone now but it was an awful time when I doubted everything in my life and myself.
Was I wrong and were they right?
I was tormented by doubts about my salvation but my experience of the Holy Spirit was more real than anything I had ever called true.
We are still at the Church and we are loved by so many other true Christian’s there and I don’t want to run anymore . This time I am not blaming myself for everything.
I want to say Thank You for sharing your heart with us.
XxxX
This blesses me so much to hear that you have found a space that loves you and holds you up. That’s what we want! And thank you for sharing pieces of your own journey here ❤️❤️❤️
This song Manasseh by Anna Golden speaks of church hurt.
On Spotify if you listen to the intro first, as it tells the background of the song, and then listen to the song.
I’ll check it out ❤️❤️❤️
One thing church hurt has taught me is that we serve God alone.
We answer to Him and Him alone. When I get to heaven, I won't stand before my pastor.
I have also tried to accept that a church is made up of sinners who are forgiven.
We all mess up. We all hurt each other.
We all expect a whole lot from one another, and maybe sometimes it's too much because when our church friends fail us, it hurts so deeply.
Church hurt is a big deal, and so many of us have experienced it.
Yes 🙌 this ❤️❤️❤️
Sarah, first of all ... thank you for sharing your story and being vulnerable in this space 🙏 💖
I have a very similar story and it has always left me baffled. However, my experience also drew me deeper into the arms if Jesus my sweet redeemer and one true love 🥰
This happened 16 years ago and I still struggle with connection. I've forgiven, but still need to revisit forgiveness on occasion. Everytime I pass the church I pray for the leadership and people, but it still hurts sometimes.
A big part of my story was about an abusive husband who was lying to the church and refused to get the help our family so desperately needed. It was a slow and tormenting death for myself and my 4 children 💔 My children are grown now and have each found healing in their own time and way. However, because this happened in the church and with a so called "Christian" father, it has affected their faith.
Despite their father, I've worked really hard and by the Grace of God helped us to heal and stay connected 🙏 ♥️ ❤️ ❤️❤️
Aww lovely 🥰 thank you for sharing yours! Oh, I absolutely agree on the seeing people and reminding myself that I truly have forgiven, but it does bring up some memories that I didn’t share in this post. Oh but the love and life I have found with Jesus just can’t be compared!
I love your writing!
Aww Tina!!! Thank you so much for saying that ❤️ bless xx.
100% needed this encouragement. Thanks.
Thanks for reading ❤️
Well, clearly u were in legalistic church. And I am glad that u r out from the false doctrines as well.
It's sad to see that there are many church who don't operate in spirit.
A church who is teaching u to depend on self or pastor or is more busy celebrating each and every day then I guess it's not the church u wanna be in.
A church that helps u grow spiritually, feeds ur spiritual hunger, helps u getting more dependent on God rather than a pastor or self then that's the church u shud be in.
Thankfully God has led me to such a church. It's an online church and people from different cities connect each other. And the bond we have with each other is more real than those who have church in person.
In case if u r still struggling with church, then u may connect with Andrew Wommack ministry. He has wonderful teachings available which will help u grow in Lord more. I was associated with this ministry before I found my church. So that time, Andrew wommack ministry was my church.
Thank you so much for sharing your resources. I will definitely look into some online churches while I find my new home base. Bless ❤️
This is us right now. We left our old church & are yet to find another church. It's hard & painful. But we trusting Jesus to lead us to where we belong