Shame Of The Past…
This year I went to a birthday party where I reunited with the friends of my early twenties. As the night wore on, the stories started rolling out.
Remember when you did this?
Remember when you were so drunk you did that?
Remember that night you were so high you went…?
Then the digs came… “Little Miss Christian girl, wasn’t very Christian… maybe you don’t remember, but we do.”
Here’s the thing all. As I sat there being reminded of my early adulthood behaviour, I felt no shame. Not because I didn’t have regrets, but because it’s in the past.
You see, I wouldn’t be where I am now or appreciate all that God has walked me through, if I hadn’t of hit rock bottom. Because that’s where Jesus reached down, I took His hand and he pulled me out from that darkness and confusion. And there’s been many times since, in many other parts of my journey where he’s had to reach into those places and pull me out again.
Those times of trauma, heartache, loneliness, rebellion, marriage troubles, fertility issues, mental health… they were lessons and testimonies in the making. Those times were wisdom building that grew empathy, sympathy, mercy, forgiveness and taught me that I really had to rely on God time and time again to reach down and pick me up, carry me in His arms and trust Him that I was strong enough to face the next challenge that would come. Because here’s the truth… while we walk this earth, challenges will keep coming.
I want this to sink in… really sink in. Even if you have to reread this part over and over until it sinks in.
Don’t be ashamed of what you’ve done or what you’ve been through. This is life and we don’t walk through it perfectly. We’re going to make mistakes, do silly things, think we have all the answers, and we’re going to come face to face with situations we cannot control.
But we can choose how we define our past and how we use it to lead others to Christ. We can share our stories and let them know they’re not alone. We can say, “Been there, done that.” And reassure them that we have a Heavenly Father that can walk us out of the mess and into Victory over and over again.
I don’t know what you’re going through or even the past you’ve been wrestling with… but God knows. And it’s never too late to cry out to Him to help pick you back up, give you strength and turn your trials into testimonies and use them for others to learn from also.
Love Sarah, xx.
*If this message was for you, I pray it blessed you today. If you feel someone else could benefit from reading this, I would love for you to take a moment to share this.