In The Uncomfortable…

A few years ago I had a to do list every day that measured longer than my arm. In my mind I always longed to be at peace and walk in calm. I often imagined myself travelling along a beach at a slow pace as my toes dug into the sand. All I could hear was the waves crashing, the crunch beneath my feet and the feel of the wind against my face. That is what being at peace and calm looked like to me.

My life… was nothing like that.

Rushing, stress, goals and busyness were my companions. In a way they made me feel like I was being productive. When it was time for bed I would reflect on my day and think about how much I had ticked off my list and feel a sense of accomplishment. At times, if I didn’t get as much done as I had hoped, I would feel a sense of shame as if I wasn’t at the top of my game.

If you’ve been following me for a while you would know that the past few years battered and almost crushed me. I walked through a fire and had to drop everything and anything I thought was a part of my identity. God did a work that not even I could see coming.

One of the areas that I struggled with was walking into a slower pace and rest. Sounds crazy right? We all long for that and yet, when it appeared for me, I had no idea what to do with it. My mind was still on high pace, achieve, achieve, achieve.

But when I stepped into the rythym of Jesus and found the path… I was uncomfortable. And let me tell you, learning to be in the uncomfortable is challenging. I was used to trauma, grief, sadness, chaos and the fast pace, kept me so busy I didn’t have to confront any of it. That to do list gave me a sense of control and I felt secure in the swirl.

But who knows that in the big picture of things, we really don’t have control?

When I let go and let God take my struggles once and for all… my life changed. When I studied Jesus in the scriptures, I found my anchor, my mentor, the way my life should be. I found His rythym. Rest, pray, read and talk.

Sometimes our uncomfortable is not in the stress, fear and anxiety of life. We think it’s found in the chaos but the truth is… in todays society, the chaos is normal. What if your uncomfortable is like mine? In the slowing down, in the peace… in the footsteps of Jesus.

What I can tell you is this, it’s only uncomfortable until it becomes a habit. The more we embrace the new way of living, the sooner it becomes our way of life.

Love Sarah, xx.

*Here’s a question for you today, where is your uncomfortable found?