Faith & Me Update: Brokenness & Other Good things.

Welcome to the latest Faith & Me Update. This week, God has been walking me right through the middle of the brokenness I have spent a lifetime out running. No longer in a broken way, but through it as to show me the blessing of what it means to be broken. I never thought I would write that… but here, I am and let me tell you I am so blessed to be able to share all of this with you. You don’t want to miss the insights of this week, so grab your tea or coffee and let’s get reading!

DIARY ENTRY:

I sit here this morning in absolute awe of the weavings and revealings of God. I've spent a lifetime trying to outrun my brokenness, each trial and each breaking adding to my armour. For sixteen months, I have been sprinting as fast as I could away from the traumatic event that finally broke me in a way I was afraid I would never recover from. But hindsight can be a beautiful thing. Last year, I began by telling myself it was the worst year of my life. Towards the end of the year, I told myself that it was the worst and most eye-opening year of my life. This year, I see that the breaking was one of the greatest things to happen to me.

In my wholeness, I was not enough. I couldn't be enough. I couldn't reach the places that God longed for me to go. I held so much within my vessel—love, hurt, joy, trauma, false beliefs, chaos—but it was tucked safely away. Yet, holding onto all of that stopped me from absorbing the right manna and stopped me from giving more of myself. But then I broke.